I’m going to try to share this story and make it short. But I think it is time to tell all who will read.
I envy those who have at least one good support system. At least one cheerleader that you can cry out your fears to and they are like, “Fuck that, you can do it! I believe in you. Don’t give up. You’re the smartest person I know.”
They rub your back or give you a hug. Send a few smiles your way or make a joke that makes your entire day better.
I so envy those people.
But, what about the rest of us misfits that have no one? We are single moms or dads. We are sick and tired of working jobs we can’t stand and barely pays enough to scratch our balls with. These days everything costs. lol
We heard a call to serve and we ARE SCRUGGLIN’. That’s right not struggling…..scrugglin’. That’s a entire different level of the “struggle being real”.
I can testify to having doubters. They tell you to go get a job, your lazy, you’re wasting time, you will never make it or you need to go back to college.
Maybe, you have one of those doubters living with you every day and when they come home from work they got this frown on their face like, “I’m busting my balls and here she is on Facebook.” lol
I love it when people assume because I’m on Facebook I’m not working. Geeze, man cut a me a break.
When you have no one, like I don’t, you have to be super brave. You have to believe for yourself.
YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR SOMEONE TO BELIEVE IN YOU!
You already know in your heart you have something to offer.
You must have a moment to yourself every day and say, “Hey, Tina, Julie, Sara, Meg or Dawn…. I know you didn’t make much money this week and bills are pilling up, but I want you to know you can do this. I want you to know, you have value. I want you to know that all it takes is determination. If we don’t know how to do something, ask! Ask the Universe. Ask someone in this group. Ask fucking Google! But don’t even think about giving up. Even though you don’t have at least one person who knows you can, I KNOW YOU CAN. You are enough. That’s all we need to win.”
Stop looking at yesterday’s failure! You know how many times these billionaire’s failed?
They didn’t just win after one time of trying. They busted their asses and got back up THOUSANDS of times.
I lost my home, car, friends and family because I lost a huge contract with one of my biggest clients where I was making $3,000 to $6,000 a month!
It was painful, humiliating even debilitating to my very soul.
If I can get my butt back up and try again, so can you. Failure just shows you what you can do to improve. Be better, stronger and wiser the next time around.
The missing component is always YOU! This time, if you fail, pick yourself up a lot faster. Then, the win will come.
I was born in the late 1970’s. I had two older sisters. My mom was a single mom. There were many rules and perceptions of life that my mom had (no judgment just facts) so we suffered all types of poverty such as living in my mom’s car, going from shelter to shelter, living in strangers homes and eating out of garbage cans. My mom was miserable. She hated men and she taught us to hate men too.
She would often leave me with my older sister who was a child molester, physically, emotionally and mentally abusive to me. In my mom’s mind she was desperate and I was the sacrifice she felt she had to make in order to survive. She would take off for months for some job in another city. Now, that I’m older I don’t believe for a second she didn’t know.
As a teenager I was very awkward, I never fit in. It was the beginning stages of being an empath. But, I had no one to shape me, who recognized it and helped me so I was odd, weird and an outcast all through my public education. Going to school was emotionally painful. I didn’t know that what I was feeling wasn’t my emotions but a mash of hundreds of other people. I didn’t figure that out until I became almost hospitalized in my 30’s from a nervous breakdown. It took a person that was also an empath and psychic to tell me of my gifts.
I was already doing tarot readings at that time. I just thought I was good at it and didn’t think there was nothing special about it. I was drawn to cards like I have never been drawn to anything in my life. I would study them over and over again. All night…all day for years.
When I was told I was an empath and she named all the things I was experiencing I cried. She also revealed my other gifts and the ones I hidden as a child. It was a huge relief. I wasn’t broken or a mistake God made.
I tried so hard to fit in as a human. You know that type of person; the one that gets good grades, popular or at least a few good friends growing up, go straight to college, get a good job, get married and have beautiful babies. Yeah, well none of that happened to me. I was rapped at 17, got pregnant at 19 but was pushed to have an abortion. I vowed to go to college….but I dropped out before my 2nd year. To avoid people, I soon went to college online and got two degrees. I was 9 months pregnant at 28 years old and right before my last two classes, I pushed through it anyway.
Then, I realized my failures were not because I wasn’t smart or lazy…something else was going on with me.
So, when I received more information about my abilities and who I really was, it made me more powerful. I then knew how to protect myself, that not being around people is ok sometimes because it just gets too overwhelming and I don’t expect other people to get it. I don’t expect even my abusive family to support or love me. To them I’m a witch. To them I do voodoo and cast spells – all because I do tarot readings. lol
I was outcast from my family too and threatened. Oh my gosh it hurt so bad. I hated myself for the longest. To have no one, is the most painful experience ever. You know what? The most supporting and loving people I have ever “met” were strangers I speak to everyday online. I grew a sister bond with one for 7 years and we never seen face to face.
Anywho…through years of not feeling worth more than shit scrapped off of someone shoes, I didn’t create good things for myself. I gained weight, my hair fell out, myself and my daughter were in and out of shelters and also lived with family that hated my guts.
Now I’m in my 40’s. I create from a magical place of forgiveness.. I also forgive myself. I stand in my greatness. That part is there when you let go of all that other crap. To have what you desire, you must first believe like you’ve never believed before that you are worth it. You must believe like your life depends on it. You must let go of all your pain and suffering. You must love yourself regardless of being molested, rape, outcast, beaten or emotionally destroyed. Use that pain and change it to triumph. Use that same depression, sadness and feelings of abandonment and rise! Use it and get the best revenge ever! Use your natural alchemy abilities to switch the shit out of your emotional heaviness and create from a place of deserving! You’ve been through enough! You don’t need not one more day of pain or suffering. You don’t need to be beaten again. STAND for yourself. The Universe Listens and the Universe Responds.
“From the depth of every tragedy RISES a powerful being like the fire of the unfed flame that radiates from the phoenix!”
Stand up for yourself. You’ve been through enough. FREE 3-Day Challenge that will put the control of your life back in your hands. I created it for people like you. Get Instant Access HERE:http://getyourtarot.com/universe-response/
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